Many months ago when I first started this blog, I had no idea what was about to transpire - I think that those who are far wiser than me did. My life never takes gentle bends or turns.. when my life changes it usually broadsides leaving me going.. what on earth just happened.. Someone said to me awhile back, you ask for everything you get.. it bothered me to think that I could have called into my life, the events that unfolded in January..
Over the months, I have not shared anything with anybody, because did not have the Crone wisdom, to differentiate between whining and a genuine need for support.. So, I am here now because I need a place to make sense of things, I need a place to say the words without fear of judgement, blame, guilt. I need a place where I can let go what is not mine..>I need a place to claim back what is me.. I need a place to heal and grow..
I need to let go of expectations I have put on myself that are not realistic and I also need to put a few goals in place, that are attainable.
I have known for sometime that the time was getting close to take back my power and in the last few days, I have been blessed with email conversations with two very wise woman.. Both have said things that have stirred a breeze that I feel will become the wind beneath my wings..and while the words have been sent out to places far beyond what I can see, I want to write those two things here...
Kerina wrote: *shakes head* We are strange creatures,we humans..we expect from ourselves what we would never expect from others...the day I realised that I just can't push anymore was one of the most liberating I have had,,Realising it is not weakness nor giving in..it just is.In body mind and spirit I gave up societies idea of 'normal' a long time ago ...also liberating.Never defeated, just human,just real..
And today Jodi said to me:
Sometimes it can be healing just putting thoughts out there, but it needs to be a caring place to do it.. Maybe it is time for you to focus more on that then butterflies and breezes blog...it is all about different seasons etc for things.
I am planning to set this blog to private for awhile at least.. if you would like to be part of it still please email me on wendy@frommyhearth and I will send you an invite..
So here I am and here you are - I would be honoured if you stayed, but understand if you leave.. Blessings.
I was only thinking the other day there were a few girls whose blogs I enjoyed that have been missing ....yours was one of them, I hoped that all was well with you...I will stay with you...there have been times for me that the words of strangers have meant the most to me than those who were closest.
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